About That Mom Life Formerly MAMAPRENEUR

How I found Myself Unemployed after Maternity Leave

August 10, 2019 in Working

Last Updated on September 16, 2022 by Natalie

My job was a dream job. Kinda.

I have been an independent contractor who works as an Account Executive for a marketing agency for the past 6 years.

It was an interesting set up.

There were, of course, some cons about the job.

Cons of My Job

1. I’ve always said that you’d never catch me in a customer service-oriented job.

I’m not much of a people person.

I am good at it. But it takes effort. It’s not something that comes naturally to me.

2. The kind of work we did was not fun. This was definitely not a case of sexy marketing.

3. I hate having a boss. No one likes it, but I have a strong aversion that always leaves me feeling resentful after someone tells me what to do.

I hate that someone can scold you for a mistake that they can make all the time and you can’t call them out when they do it.

I’m big on fairness. It trumps titles any day, in my book.

Pros of My Job

The flexibility, good pay and a human-first mentality made me feel there was no better option out there.

The agency owner always stressed how much she valued work/life balance.

Like with many other things she said, there were mixed messages about her stance on this concept.

What my Job Gave Me

I chose to work from my parents’ office a couple of blocks from my house (yay to hanging out with mom and dad!) but when one of my beloved furbabies was diagnosed with cancer in December 2018, I spent my time working from home so I can be with him as much as possible.

I was so grateful that I had a job that allowed me to do this.

Outside of client meetings, I worked when (mostly) and where I wanted.

2 hour lunch breaks with my sister or my parents, put a load of laundry to wash, take my dogs to their many veterinary appointments…and all while getting paid well.

I gave back to my job

I worked efficiently so I was always hitting deadlines and delivering quality work in the process.

My dad always taught me to be the best at whatever I do and I knew that to keep the luxury that this job provided, I was going to need to exceed expectations.

Being that I worked from home without being supervised meant that I needed to work louder to be noticed.

It was because of this that the agency owner always referred to me as a “rockstar.”

Let’s call her my boss, for lack of a better term.

I was the only Account Executive that stuck. Any others never made it past 2 years.

The Perfect Job for Mommy Me?

When I learned I was pregnant, my boss was on maternity leave.

I already work at a super flexible job which will be great when I have the baby and now my boss will pave the road before me, freshly knowing exactly how it feels to go through it all.

Before my boss knew I was pregnant, she confessed that she had told her husband at one point that she didn’t want to go back to work.

Perfect. She’s human.

When she came back to work, she set up her schedule so that she would not work Mondays and Fridays. Only Tuesday thru Thursday.

Human.

Her assistant scheduled any meetings around her pumping schedule.

Human mama.

When I told her I was pregnant, she squealed with excitement.

On more than one occasion she said:

“I have a feeling that after you have your baby, you won’t want to spend as many hours working as you do now.”

And

“You can set up a schedule like me where you only work certain days of the week.”

That was a great idea. One that framed my vision of my return to work.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks before my maternity leave was over.

Record Scratch

I spoke to my boss who asked if I was coming back to work.

“Of course,” I said.

She celebrated.

Then she asked what that would look like.

I told her I was planning on easing back in.

I wasn’t sure if I should just work certain days a week like her or work half day everyday.

There was a pause. She said that I can figure out what works best.

I sensed a hesitation in her tone.

She mentioned that she had a lot of meetings planned for the summer.

She was overwhelmed and “burning the candle at both ends” and had been looking forward to my return so she could get some relief because she was “done” with all the work.

It suddenly became obvious that we were both on very different pages when envisioning my coming back to work.

…and she was trying to erase any memory of the part time idea she put in my head.

Already-long-story-a-little-less-long, she wanted me to work more than I had been before maternity leave.

There was a long list of “important” in person meetings for me to attend, more clients and no other Account Executives to help support.

I said I was willing to work as much as I had been before but not more.

End result

She chose to work without me and handle the meetings and clients herself since I couldn’t give the amount of support she needed.

Hm.

I need 10 pennies, you can give me 7 and I need to come up with 3 on my own.

Naturally, the logical thing is to say no thanks and come up with all 10 pennies myself.

Oh and “no hard feelings.” She felt going our separate ways would save our magnificent friendship in the long run.

Then she had her assistant change my email password and follow up with me to collect all of the company property.

Let’s Get Real

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a sense of relief when she decided she would move forward without me.

Of course, I need to make some income but as much as I dreaded client meetings and frivolous tasks before, I hated the thought of them even more now.

They meant I would need to leave my baby, which I had no desire to do.

It meant someone would need to give him a bottle, when I have been exclusively breastfeeding.

“You know you will need to leave him at some point,” Boss lady pointed out to me.

Nothing like these constructive comments to make you feel like people think you’re crazy and have formed an unhealthy attachment to your baby.

Someone check with the looney bin to see if they have space for one more.

Of course, I know that the day will come when I will need to be away from my baby.

But it’s up to me when that is. And I say it’s not going to be when he’s so small. There’s no need for that.

I used to think 3 months was so much time, but after going through it, I personally feel 3 months is not enough for maternity leave.

My job used to be great because of the flexibility, good pay and a human-first mentality.

Once we take away the flexibility and human-first mentality, we’re no longer a good fit.

And yes, I do think it lost its human factor.

My boss…who:

✅ is a woman

✅ gave birth months before me

✅ pumped for her child on a schedule

Left me jobless right after I had a baby because 1. I wasn’t willing to work more hours than I did before I had a baby and 2. because I said I needed to take a pump break in meetings that ran longer than 2.5 hours.

And those are the two reasons she gave me.

I have been her loyal, constant, right hand for several years. The only one ever to exceed expectations.

Boss lady could have clued me in on the change in the level of support needed earlier than the week before I was scheduled to return.

If she had, I could’ve at least gotten a head start in formulating my plan for how I can help my husband support our family.

But here I am and I needed to figure out how I can make money while being with my baby.

And this is me sharing my journey with you.

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Comments

  2. Sometimes the most unplanned and unexpected things can be a good thing in disguise. I was let go from my full time job of years while on disability recovering from lung surgery. It was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

    Reply

  3. I think you will rock this challenge. Best wishes, and thanks for sharing your journey with us! There are probably many in a similar boat who would benefit from your stories and process.

    Reply

  4. Bosses are definitely not fun to have. I am about to start a new job but luckily it’s at home. It seems more independent and less micromanaging. Thank you for talking about your experiences.

    Reply

    • Thanks. Although it’s not the easy route, I think it was all for the best. I’m excited about what life can be like. It is just taking… some time ?

      Reply

  8. You’ve got this! What a crappy way that all transpired, but you’ll be better for it in the end. Keep on Thrivin’!

    Reply

  12. It all works out in the end. I went back to work after 12 weeks off and made it a week. Then stayed home and found a nanny gig I could bring my newbord with till I could figure it all out! Enjoy the little one – they grow too fast!

    Reply

  13. The problem for working for someone else is this. When it suits them you are disposable. But such is life. At least you are home with your baby! Everything happens for a reason!

    Reply

  14. Your story sounds all too familiar. Something like this happened to me after I had my first child in 2009 and ever since then, I’ve worked for myself. I know this is not the ideal way you wanted things to work out but everything happens for a reason. Enjoy every precious moment with your baby and know that everything will work out for you.

    Reply

    • Thanks for this comment! You’re right. I think this is what was right for me and my baby and spending this time with him was the most important priority for me.

      Reply

  19. Wow! I’m sure you were frustrated and relieved all at the same time! But I bet your loving spending all that time with your sweet baby! ?

    Reply

  20. So sorry you had to go through this. Looks like you and your family will be better off in the long run. Thank you for sharing.

    Reply

  21. I hate that your hope was built up thinking your job would continue to be the perfect job. Sadly, I feel like so many bosses do this when people return from maternity leave. But as always, I think things happen for a reason.

    Reply

  22. Isn’t it interesting how things work out? What seems like a road block or disaster actually turned out to be stepping stones to your next work in life. Great work!

    Reply

    • Thank you! I really believe that to be true. I used to think it was impossible to find a better job than what I had. Now I think that the best job for me is currently underway.

      Reply

  23. Oh my goodness!! Wow. She sounds like she’s good at considering her needs (well done her) but not at considering the needs of others (poorly done her). Glad you are free of the games of workplace bureaucracy and can focus on your little one. But sorry how it all went down.

    Reply

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